Tuesday, September 8, 2009

You Can't

Until recently, I never realized how powerful the words and beliefs of others can be on our psyche. I was reflecting on last week, my first week on the new job, over the weekend and was truly grateful for the people who built me up and helped me believe in myself. To be honest, a lot of the time lately I am faking my confidence. I'm a believer in "fake it til ya make it". I may not believe in myself completely just yet, but I am surrounded by people who do believe in me.

For the last 8 years I have been surrounded by negativity and criticism. Constantly reminded of each time I failed, never allowed to live it down. I worked in a job that I hated for a long time...well, until I got fired. Many of my friends probably remember how miserable I was in that job and how long I wanted to quit. I hated what I did...accounting. Not my forte. I can do it, but it's not what I enjoy and I think eventually I was so miserable I didn't care anymore. I had an opportunity to go back to my recruiting job, but was not "allowed" to because we were trying to buy a house. I'm the kind of person that puts happiness before things, so I would have gladly delayed buying a house to be in a job that made me happy. It wasn't until I was fired that I was able to go back to my recruiting job...and was very successful.

I've been a stay-at-home-mom for 3 years now. I don't like it. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but I feel like I am a better mom when I'm working outside the home. I have longed to go back to work but again, was told I couldn't. I can't quite express how good it feels to be going back to work. I don't think I can put into words exactly how freeing it feels to me. It's a powerful feeling.

I let someone call the shots in my life. None of the decisions were really mutual - "this is how it's gonna be." I don't work very well that way. Maybe for a little while, but not forever.

Anyway, it made me think...who we surround ourselves with is so important. Do the people around you build you up or tear you down? Do they make you feel powerful or do they make you feel small and dependent? Do they make you feel like you can take on the world...and win?

My friends do that. They make me feel like I can do anything, overcome anything and mostly...like I can take on anything...and WIN! My friends are not "you can't" people, they are the people that tell me "you CAN" when I feel like giving up and giving in.

1 comment:

  1. You really CAN do this. I'm so glad you have strong friends to lift you up. Great friends make a world of difference.