First things first...
Happy 8th Birthday to my "Little B"!! Hard to believe he has been mine for 8 years!!
Tomorrow the 3 "Little Mikes" will be boarding a plane with their daddy to go visit their grandparents in Florida for the Thanksgiving holiday. They will be gone 12 days!! (Could you hear my huge sigh of relief?!) This idea sounded super great to me when my ex-husband originally presented it. 12 days with no kids??? AMEN! My "mom breaks" are rare and single parenting 4 children with minimal help is, well, challenging sometimes. I feel like I am constantly running crazy and my house is usually filled with chaos during waking hours. 12 days of quiet and less running around, less laundry, less feeding, less cleaning, less less less...will be much appreciated.
Yesterday I was packing a suitcase for the kids and all of a sudden it hit me...
Oh my God, they're going to FLORIDA!!!! WITHOUT me!!!! My chest got tight, my breathing got shallow...I had an intense physical reaction to this thought. It's so far. It's for so long. What if, what if, what if???
I had to remind myself to breathe. I couldn't believe that I had gone from being giddy with anticipation over their departure to having what felt like a panic attack. (I wouldn't know as I don't suffer panic attacks...at least I don't think I do) Being divorced definitely has a perk in that it gives you that free weekend every other week. It's nice to have time and space to re-energize or, if in my case catch up on errands, household chores and work projects...and throw in a little social fun here and there. Every other weekend is great. The week vacation during the summer was great too. Florida, 3000 miles away....ummmmm, mama's getting worried.
Faith. For the next 2 weeks I will live on faith. I have vowed not to worry about them and trust that their father, who I know loves them as much as I do, will take the best of care of them. Worrying will do me no good, will not avoid anything, so I'm just going to have faith that they will have the best of times, be well cared for, well loved and returned home safely to me.
This is our group hug, love fest right before their dad picked them up and scooped them off to the airport. At time of posting, the Little Mikes have arrived safely in Tampa, are exhausted and on their way to the beach.